Memories
by anachronismism
Summary: Chihiro stumbles back into the Spirit World with no recollection whatsoever of her last adventure. Haku finds her, but what would that mean for them?
1. Chapter 1: Dreams

Chapter 1: Dreams

_"Don't be afraid, I just want to help you…"_

_"__Once you've met someone, you never really forget them. It just takes a while for your memories to return… " _

_"You did it Chihiro! I remember…"_

_"Now go and don't look back…"_

Chihiro woke up. Her alarm had not gone off yet since it was just five in the morning.

"Huh, it's that dream again."

Chihiro once more dreamt of this far-off place, filled with these strange creatures; frogmen, old women with gigantic heads, all kinds of crazy spirits and of course, a dragon, but her dreams were always hazy, she could never really remember them all. She was just like everyone else. Her dreams always made her feel like she was looking through a thick fog, where flashes of images raced before her eyes, but there was always this one moment when everything was so clear; it felt as if it was not a dream anymore. These were the times when she dreamt of this boy, an inexplicably handsome boy with beautiful green eyes. She always dreamt of holding the unknown boy's hand as they ran across a somehow familiar town. She could not really tell what was around her; all she could see was the road ahead of her and the boy. He was saying something about her parents being on the other side of a river; she could never understand what he was saying. He always stopped at the boundary of the town, near a gigantic stone frog, just before a flight of stone stairs. She was telling the boy that she could walk across now, but the boy stated that he could not go any farther. "Just go back the way you came, you'll be fine," he said, "But you have to promise not to look back, not until you've passed through the tunnel." She asked what would happen to him. He said, "Don't worry I'm gonna go back and have a talk with Yubaba. I'll tell her I'm going quit being her apprentice and I'll return to my world. I'm fine now I've got my name back." She asked him if they would meet again, he promised that they would. He promised. He said all of this with a smile on his face. His smile, she felt like he was hiding something behind it. They said there silent goodbyes and Chihiro began to run down the stairs. She could never forget that part of her dreams, when they said their goodbyes. There was something strange with the way he held her hand before she left. He held onto it as if they would never see each other again; he hesitated, but he did let her go. She ran giddily down the stairs and once she reached the last one, she wakes up. This happens every time she dreams of this certain world.

Chihiro was always frustrated with her dreams. She had this gnawing feeling that she knew the boy from somewhere. She wondered if she somehow knew his name. Maybe, he was a childhood friend or acquaintance she long forgot. Maybe, he was just someone she imagined. The boy was an enigma to her. However, she always wondered what she was talking about in her dreams. Why would the hills turn into a river? What did the boy mean by "I'm fine now that I've got my name back"? Who was Yubaba anyway? Why could she not look back? Eventually, Chihiro would dismiss those thoughts and say that the only reason he seems familiar is that she had dreamt about him countless times before, and the things they talked about were just nonsense her subconscious thought up. However, deep inside, Chihiro knew she is not imaginative enough to dream up that whole world.

Chihiro had to get out of bed eventually. Another mundane Monday has begun for Chihiro.


	2. Chapter 2: Tunnel

Chapter 2: Tunnel

The week went by in a blur. Chihiro did not even notice that it was already Friday. Everything was so mundane; go to school, go home, do your homework. Although sometimes, she would go out with some friends and try to enjoy herself, she still felt it was not enough to make her happy. She felt that her life was empty. She was not unhappy. On the contrary, her life was good; their family business was doing well, she had exemplary grades, and everyone found her charming, no one hated her. However, all that cannot erase the fact that she was still not happy.

She was now on her way home from school. She did not want to go home right away, but she did not feel like hanging out with her friends. She walked aimlessly along the highway, until she recognized a large tree with tiny houses scattered beneath it. She faintly remembered asking her mother about these houses when they first moved to that town, and she remembered her father taking that road as a "short cut" to their little blue house. Knowing it was a long way home, she decided to take the "short cut", so she could pass her time walking through the forest.

It was a beautiful day. It was refreshing to feel the wind pass by as she trod along the dirt road. The birds were singing, the trees swayed to the breeze, and the sun was peeping through the gigantic white clouds. However, all this tranquility left her room to think. She thought about her life, her existence. She could feel a great void in her being. She wondered if everyone felt the way she did, and deep inside she knew she was the only one who felt that. She was deep in her thoughts, and she did not notice the Shinto statues hidden in the forest.

Then, she saw it. It was still there. She always thought that they already bulldozed that place down. She was just a few meters away, but it was not easy to spot it due to all the foliage blocking the view. She walked to it, reminiscing. She once more remembered the day when they first moved to that secluded little town. Chihiro was upset that they had to move; upset that the first time she got a bouquet of flowers was because it served as a good bye present. Her mother was trying to persuade her that moving was an "adventure" and that she would have a lot of fun in their new home. Then, her father missed the turn and decided to take the "shortcut" through the woods, they wound up getting lost, and they found themselves at the entrance of an abandoned theme park. Her father wanted to see what was on the other side, so Chihiro could not do anything but follow, despite the fact that she was terrified of going in. It seemed like ages ago even if it had only been a few years. She gazed at the two-faced statue in front of her, remembering how it creeped her out when she was ten. She stepped up to the tunnel, arguing with herself as to whether she should enter or not. It felt like the tunnel was going to eat her alive. The wind felt like it was urging her to go in. Eventually, she decided to enter, thinking that there was nothing to be afraid of; it is just a tunnel after all and she could faintly see the light from the other end. Besides, she had gone through it before.


	3. Chapter 3: Hills

Chapter 3: Hills

Chihiro walked into the tunnel, telling herself that it was ridiculous to be afraid. "It's just a tunnel, it is not going to eat you", she kept telling herself. She remembered clinging to her mother as they walked through that very tunnel. She was stumbling through the darkness, almost tripping. Finally, she reached its end.

She entered a large room, its ceiling was supported by large pillars and it was filled with wooden benches; the place _was_ an abandoned theme park. Just across she could see the doorway that led to the outside. She thought of going back, but once she glanced at the tunnel behind her, she shuddered and decided to go on. The late afternoon sun shone through the tiny stained glass windows, as water from yesterday's rain dripped from the leaking ceiling. It was eerily quiet. She made her way out of the large room and stepped into the vast meadow.

She forgot how beautiful it was. Two- faced statues, similar to the one in front of the tunnel, were scattered along the hillside. The grass swayed gracefully as the gentle breeze caressed it. Everything was so peaceful. The path that cut through the hills lay in front of her. She could not clearly remember where it led, but she could see the roofs of the buildings of the amusement park. A breeze came through the tunnel, ushering her to go there. She remembered how she thought that the building moaned as her mother reassured her that it was just the wind.

She climbed up the hill, admiring the scenery. She eventually reached the unfinished river with its gigantic boulders. She struggled to get across; she is clumsy after all. After hobbling over the rocks, she finally went her way up the stone steps.

She was almost at the top now. She was just a step below the gigantic frog statue; it seemed oddly familiar. For some reason, she hesitated in taking that last step. "Why am I so scared? It's just some abandoned theme park; there's nothing to be afraid of," she thought. She finally decided to go up the last step and she lightly touched the statue. She was about to explore the theme park, but then she saw the view from there; she could see everything from there; the hills, the mountains, it was stunning. She sat on that last step for a while, watching the sun slowly set over the horizon. It was almost nightfall now, and she would eventually have to go through the tunnel and back home. She decided she might as well go home. She stood up, figuring her parents would scold her if she goes home any later. Before leaving, she patted the statue's head as the darkness finally took over the land. Without warning, water flooded from the frog's mouth. The hills swiftly turned into a large river. She panicked. "What's happening?! How am I going to get home?" she yelled.


	4. Chapter 4: Bridge

Chapter 4: Bridge

Chihiro was now alone and trapped in an abandoned theme park with a gigantic body of water blocking her only route home. She was on the verge of tears. She did not know what to make of her situation. Then, she saw lights come alive all around her. In the distance, she saw a boat covered with yellow lights come out of nowhere, slowly on its way to where she was standing. It shone brightly in contrast to the dark river.

Chihiro was terrified. She did not know what to do. Her instincts took hold of her, and she began to run. She sprinted through the streets, passing the restaurants filled with shadowy spirits. Tears were now flowing from her eyes. She was lost and confused. All she could think of was to run and get away from that place; anywhere was better than that strange amusement park. She ran until her legs could not take it anymore, and her chest constricted as she gasped for air. She stopped near a bridge, panting and holding onto its rail for support. As she tried to catch her breath, she caught sight of her hands. She could see through them! She tried to hold the rail of the bridge, but her hands went through it. She shrieked and began to cry, for she did not know what else to do.

Then she heard someone's steps as they were walking on the bridge. She was too scared and confused to even bother to look at who it was. She was surprised to hear someone say, "Chihiro, what are you doing here?!". She looked up at what the stranger said. There she saw a boy in a white kimono and hakema pants, his face creased with shock and worry. She could not even question how he knew her name; she was too emotional at the time to react. "Chihiro, what happened?" he asked.


	5. Chapter 5: Berry

Chapter 5: Berry

Haku was shocked to find Chihiro on the bridge to Yuababa's bathhouse. He just checked in the bathhouse and was on his way to visit Zeniba. It was a while since he went to that part of the Spirit World. Zeniba made him promise to visit her whenever he was in town. Actually, the only reason he came to the bathhouse as a guest was that he missed Chihiro terribly. He wanted to visit the place where they were once together. He wanted to go to the place that served as evidence of Chihiro's stay in the Spirit World, because it sometimes felt like it was all just a dream. Haku sometimes doubted if Chihiro was real. When that happened, he would immediately fly to the bathhouse and reminisce. He would talk to Lin and visit Kamaji in the boiler room. The only problem was it hurt so much to be there. He would sometimes anticipate Chihiro to be just around the corner to greet him, or in the female bathhouse workers' room sleeping. When he could not bear the pain of longing anymore, he would check out, say his goodbyes, and once more return to his part of the Spirit World.

Haku did not know whether he should be devastated by the fact that Chihiro was in the Spirit World, or be overjoyed because she was there, she was physically there. When Chihiro looked at him with tears streaming across her face, his face creased with even more worry. She did not answer when he asked her what was wrong. She was fading.

He slipped a berry from his pocket; it was just like the one he gave to Chihiro when she first came to that world. He put his hands on her shoulders, just as he did the first time she was in the Spirit World. He even spoke the same words, "Don't be afraid, I just wanna help you." The only difference was Chihiro did not protest. Instead, she gazed at him with big brown teary eyes. Haku secretly hoped that she would say his name. "Open your mouth and eat this. You have to eat food from this world, or else you'll disappear," he said, "Don't worry, nothing's gonna happen to you." He fed her the berry. "Chew it and swallow", he instructed. Chihiro was becoming solid once more. "There you go, you're all better. See for yourself", Haku said as he held his hand out to her. She hesitated at first, but eventually she placed her hand on his. He could tell that she was relieved to see her hands whole again.


	6. Chapter 6: Confusion

Chapter 6: Confusion

It was strange how Chihiro felt so secure when this stranger put his hands around her shoulders. Somehow, it all seemed too familiar. She studied his face as he instructed her to eat the berry he was handing her. His face seemed familiar. She was digging through her memory as she chewed and swallowed. Then the stranger held out his hand as he was assuring her that she was all better now. Chihiro felt surprised by his familiarity, maybe he really did know her, but why would he be in this strange place? She hesitated touching his hand, afraid that her own hand would go through. Then it hit her; the stranger was the boy in her dreams. She put her hand in his. She was relieved to see her hand whole again. The boy gently squeezed her hand and smiled, his green eyes sparkling. She felt guilty not knowing who he was. He seemed to know her very well.

Now she was extremely confused. She remembered part of her dreams, especially the part when she ran alongside the boy. Did she really know the boy from somewhere, and inserted him into her dreams? Her dreams could not have possibly happened. They could not; it was impossible. It occurred to her that maybe, the impossible can happen. She _is_ currently trapped in a _supposed_ abandoned theme park. The hills suddenly turned into a river, preventing her from getting home. She thought she saw shadows in the restaurants as she ran across the theme park. Her hands became see-through. A boy she frequently dreamt of fed her a berry that made her solid again. Maybe, nothing really is impossible. "Chihiro, are you alright?", the boy asked. He still seemed to be worried. She just nodded in reply.


	7. Chapter 7: Yes

Chapter 7: Yes

Chihiro was silent. She seemed to be lost in her thoughts. Of course. Haku tried so hard to evade the truth, but now, it hit him hard; Chihiro cannot remember him. He felt foolish for hoping that she would say his name, that she would throw her arms around him as if she would never let him go, and say that she missed him just as much as he missed her.

He asked her if she was alright, she just nodded in response. Haku could see that the spirit boat just docked onto the port. He had to get Chihiro out of there before she could attract any unnecessary attention. She was not supposed to be here. He could faintly hear the bathhouse workers' voices as they were on their way to greet the incoming wave of guests. "Chihiro, can you stand up?", he asked. She nodded. "Now Chihiro, we have to go. I have to get you somewhere safe, so follow me", he instructed. She just nodded once more in response. Haku held her hand tightly as they sprinted across the amusement park to the train station by the bathhouse, the very one where she waited for the train to go to Zeniba's, where she asked for forgiveness on his behalf. It did not take long before they reached it. There, Chihiro could be safe, for now.

Haku sat Chihiro on the floor. She was still silent and remained deep in her thoughts. He sat next to her and waited patiently for her to speak. Finally, Chihiro spoke. "Am I dreaming?", she asked. Haku did not know what to say; he was speechless. He argued with himself as to whether he should say yes or no. He really wanted to say no; tell her that all of this was real, that this was not a figment of her imagination or a product of her subconscious, that he was here and she was there with him, but he had to say yes. He was torn between having _his_ Chihiro, and letting her believe that this was all a dream. Haku loved Chihiro; he can never deny it, but she is not supposed to remember. The truth always hurt him as no other pain in that world could. It hurt so much that he had to lie; he found it almost impossible. He had no choice but to say yes. He loved Chihiro too much.

"Yes Chihiro, this is all a dream", he said with the best smile he could muster, masking the pain brutally stabbing his heart.


	8. Chapter 8:Doubt

Chapter 8: Doubt

The boy set Chihiro down on the floor of what looked like a bus stop although there were railway tracks in front of it; it must be a train station. She was wondering if all of this was real. Maybe she was just dreaming, but she could not recall going to bed or sleeping, for that matter; she could not even recall returning home from school. This was all so confusing. What is this place? Who is this boy? She was so frustrated because no matter how hard she sought for answers, she came up short. The boy sat patiently beside her. This was all too much for her. She might as well ask. "Am I dreaming?", she asked.

He did not answer right away. Chihiro figured he was contemplating on his answer. Finally, the boy replied; he told Chihiro that yes, this was all a dream, but she could not help doubting him. His mouth was saying yes, but his eyes were telling a completely different story. She remembered that people used to say that eyes could never lie. He really seemed like he was hiding something. All she could do was nod in response. She pondered over his answer. "If I _were_ dreaming, would I really tell myself that I _am_ dreaming?", she thought. There was also the fact that when the boy appeared in her dreams, it was always the same thing. She dreamt that they were saying their goodbyes and the boy always promised to her that they would see each other again. Then again, she could be dreaming a new dream, but her dreams of that world were always constant; they never changed, even if her other dreams did. She was so confused. He stood up, interrupting her thoughts. He offered his hand and said, "Chihiro, we need to find a place for you to sleep. I cannot let you stay out in the cold all night. I might as well take you to Zeniba's. Please don't be frightened when you see me change." She just nodded in reply. She did not understand what he meant by "change". He managed to perplex her even more with what he said. How can a person sleep in his or her own dream? Chihiro began to doubt the boy if he was really telling the truth. She wondered why he could be lying. Was he protecting her from something? If so, then what was it? But most of all, why does she trust this stranger so much? As she sank deeper into confusion, the boy transformed into a dragon right before her eyes. He must really be the boy from her dreams. She thought, "Maybe I really am dreaming."


	9. Chapter 9: Dragon

Chapter 9: Dragon

It was getting cold. Haku worried about Chihiro once more. She was still human, but she did not seem to be bothered with how chilly it was. It was probably because she was still absorbed in her thoughts. He also began to worry if Chihiro doubted his answer; was he that transparent? Enough to detect that he was lying?

"No", Haku thought, "Enough of this. I must return her to the human world as soon as possible. She must not remember; she cannot know that I lied, but we have to wait until sunrise in time for the meadow to reappear. What will we do until then?"

Zeniba. Of course. Zeniba could help Haku. She could let Chihiro sleep at her house for the night, and she could help him make sure that she does not recover her memories. He felt his heart wrench at that fact. It hurt that he loves Chihiro so much, but cannot let her remember what happened to her in this world, _his_ world. "Enough", Haku thought, "I must get her to Zeniba's at once." He hoped Chihiro would still think that this was all a dream. He has to change into a dragon to get them to Swamp Bottom. He glanced at Chihiro; she was still deep in thought. He stood up, offered his hand and said, "Chihiro, we need to find a place for you to sleep. I cannot let you stay out in the cold all night. I might as well take you to Zeniba's. Please don't be frightened when you see me change." She nodded even though it was evident that she was confused with what he said. He took a few steps away from Chihiro and he changed into his dragon self. Haku saw that Chihiro was stunned. He motioned for her to climb onto his back. Surprisingly, she cautiously mounted him without any hesitation. Once she was on his back, she held tightly onto his horns. Then, he bounded off the train station and flew into the sky.


	10. Chapter 10: Remembering

Chapter 10: Remembering

Haku forgot how wonderful it was to fly with Chihiro. Even though she does not remember him, just her being there somehow lessened the pain. However, Haku knew that once she leaves, it would hurt even more.

Chihiro felt something unexplainable as they soared through the starry night sky; she felt something was coming on. She felt so comfortable on the dragon's back as they soared through the sky. She felt that she had done this before; no matter how ridiculous that seemed to her. The familiarity of it all, it incurred an unexpected nostalgia for Chihiro.

Images flashed through her head. Images of when she was ten years old; when they first moved to that town. When she and her parents explored the abandoned theme park and her parents began to devour the food in one of the stalls.

A flood of repressed memories came crashing through, memories of her time in the Spirit World; working in the bathhouse, meeting Haku, Kamaji, Lin, Yubaba, Boh, No Face, Zeniba, and all the other spirits, helping a famous river god, saving Haku from the gold seal's spell, taking the Spirit Train to Zeniba's, rescuing her parents, and of course giving Haku's real name back. She felt her hair for the hair clip her friends made for her. She always assumed one of her old friends from her hometown gave it to her. "Thank God I didn't throw this away," she thought to herself. She felt relieved to find it holding her hair up.

She buried her face into Haku's neck, inhaling his intoxicating sent. It was unearthly; the smell of water, wind, and rain. His scent evoked the memory of her love for him. She could not hold it in any longer, she had to tell him that she remembers. "I'm sure he'll be happy. Maybe I should also apologize for not remembering," she thought.

"Haku, I remember", Chihiro muttered. Haku's eyes grew wide. "She was not supposed to remember! How can the spell wear off? And in such a short amount of time? Is it because of me? But I couldn't just leave her there, fading", he argued with himself. Then it occurred to him. Haku's thoughts went back to the time when he woke up in the boiler room, right after he stole Zeniba's gold seal. Kamaji muttered to him, "Can't beat the power of love".


	11. Chapter 11: Why?

Chapter 11: Why?

Haku could not respond to what Chihiro just said. She was not supposed to remember. She was not even supposed to come back. He began to fear that the memory spell might not work anymore, that Chihiro will still remember the Spirit World. "It might wear off while she is in the human world, or worse, the spell might not work at all," he thought, "Chihiro would go home remembering everything." He did not know how he should react to that. He did not know if he should be happy or sad.

Haku decided that he must discuss this matter to Zeniba; he has to find a way to reinforce the spell. She must not remember. Chihiro wondered why Haku did not respond. She expected him to be happy by the fact that she remembers him. He did not seem angry earlier, when she did not remember him, so why was he upset?

As they neared Swamp Bottom, Chihiro recalled the last time they saw each other. She remembered the way Haku held her hand before she ran down those stone steps. It was obvious that he did not want to let go, as if she would be gone forever if he did. She wondered, "Why did he act like that? He promised we would see each other again, and here he is keeping his promise."

She remembered the temptation of looking back, and her devotion to the promise she made to Haku; she did not look back, not even once, until she went through the tunnel. She remembered the moment before she exited the tunnel. Her mind went blank that time; that must have something to do with her forgetting. She remembered emerging from the tunnel and looking back. She felt like she forgot something, something very important.

She could not hold back her tears anymore. She hated herself for forgetting. She wept as they landed in front of Zeniba's home. Haku did not know what to do; he felt Chihiro's tears on his neck as they landed. Once they did, he patiently waited for Chihiro to climb off his back. She was staring at Zeniba's hut as she stepped onto the ground. Tears were still falling.

He reverted to his human form. "Haku, why did I forget? Why did you tell me not to look back?", she said. He did not know what to answer. She could not help but ask.


	12. Chapter 12: Zeniba

oh no.... i forgot the disclaimers for the last 11 chapters.... oops... sorry ;P

Disclaimer: I do not own Spirited Away

(but if i did... i'd make a sequel XD)

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Chapter 12: Zeniba

Chihiro should not have asked. She began to regret what she had just said. Haku's face lost all the color left on his naturally pale face. Haku was trying to formulate a response; he did not know _how much_ he could or should tell Chihiro. Chihiro just gazed expectantly at his green eyes hoping for an answer. The silence between them was unsettling.

"Chihiro!" Zeniba came rushing out of the door. Haku felt a wave of relief as he watched Chihiro run to the old woman.

Zeniba watched Chihiro and Haku as they landed on her front yard. It was obvious; the spell was broken. Tears were on her face, while his face showed evident anxiety.

"She's probably asking why she could not remember," Zeniba thought. She could only let out a sigh. All the measures they took were now put to waste. Nevertheless, her being there meant a lot, especially to Haku, even if it meant great pain, greater than ever before, once Chihiro leaves him again.

"Poor Haku," she thought, "If he manages to make her leave, it will hurt him a more than ever before. How often can you let the love of your life walk away?"

Chihiro ran to her "grandmother" and hugged her tightly. Haku just gazed at the two from the yard, surrounded by the fields that Zeniba tended.

"What am I to do now? How am I going to explain this to Zeniba?", he wondered, "She probably knows what happened. Besides, _her_ "gift" was supposed to make sure that _this_ never happened."

Chihiro was so happy to see No Face as he stuck his head out of the front door. She let go of the old woman and hugged the towering, masked spirit. "No Face!," Chihiro squealed.

"Now, now, let's go inside, shall we?," Zeniba ushered, "That means you too Kohaku!"


	13. Chapter 13: Questions

Disclaimer: I do not own Spirited Away

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Chapter 13: Questions

"Why did I forget? Why did Haku tell me to never look back? Does Grandma know why I could not remember? Why do I feel like they are hiding something from me?" Chihiro thought as she struggled to control herself from asking the millions of questions that kept on popping into her head.

Zeniba set tea and some cake for her valued guests and beckoned them to sit, by waving her hands in the air, like a maestro leading an orchestra, as inanimate objects floated across the room and to the table.

"So Chihiro, would you mind telling us how you managed to get here?", she asked as she plopped herself onto a stool. Haku glared at what Zeniba had just asked. She just smiled at his reaction.

Chihiro retold her latest adventure, as if it was nothing out of the ordinary.

"I found the trail my parents and I took when we first found the Spirit World, I watched the sunset at the boundary of the Spirit World; near the frog statue by the stone steps. The valley turned into a river, so I could not get across; I was trapped. I ran and found myself at the bridge to Yuababa's bathhouse. I began to fade and then Haku found me."

Zeniba just laughed, as Haku intensified his glare. "Interesting," Zeniba muttered.

"May I ask Chihiro, but how did you come to the path once more?,"

Haku could do nothing but sit there and glare. If looks could kill, Zeniba would have died a thousand deaths with the glares Haku shot at her.

"Well," Chihiro began, unsure of what to say, "I was wandering around, then I stumbled on the path we used when I first came here, and then," Chihiro let out a sigh, "I found the entrance."

"She _stumbled_ on the path? She was _not_ supposed to find that path _ever again_, let alone the tunnel," Zeniba thought as she pondered over how Chihiro came to the Spirit World.

"But why were you wandering around in the first place Chihiro?," Zeniba asked gently. Haku let out a sigh as he sipped his tea; he gave up on glaring at Zeniba, for her questions would probably help them understand why she was there in the first place. Chihiro absently chewed her cake, trying to find the real reason of her wandering. She knew it was not because she was just bored, or she did not feel like going home. There was something more to her finding the path again; it wasn't just pure luck.

"I'm not exactly sure, but I think it was because I was kinda lonely?" Chihiro began to analyze her life after leaving the Spirit World. She was --- empty.

"I was, I guess, empty. I always felt like there was something missing. But now that I'm here, I feel ---- whole again," Chihiro smiled at what she just said. She was happy again; she could be happy again.

Haku and Zeniba looked at each other, both surprised at what Chihiro just said.

"I don't know... I just sort of decided to explore the town, and then I found the path, then the tunnel, and now I'm here." She let out a sigh, her gaze travelling around the room. Zeniba and Haku remained silent; there was nothing more to say.

Chihiro yawned a bit before sipping some more of her tea.

"Oh how inconsiderate of me!," Zeniba exclaimed, startling Chihiro, "I'm sure your completely exhausted Chihiro. Let me show you to a bed, so you can finally get some sleep."

Haku remained silent. Zeniba knew that they had much to talk about once Chihiro is asleep. Especially now that they knew how Chihiro wound up finding the Spirit World once more.

Chihiro nodded and said, "Thank you. I guess I am kinda tired."

Zeniba motioned Chihiro to follow her. Chihiro stood up, smiled at Haku, and said, "Good night Haku! Thanks for saving me a while ago." Haku nodded in response, looking at her with warm eyes, and said, "It was nothing Chihiro. Good night." Chihiro smiled.

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wait.... can anyone tell me if i should make this story end happily?? or end really sad?? or both? :)


	14. Chapter 14: Conversation

Thank you so much for all the reviews! :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Spirited Away

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Chapter 14: Conversation

Chihiro lay awake on the tiny bed Zeniba led her to sleep on. Zeniba had just left her a few moments ago, as she ushered No Face out of the room and left Chihiro to sleep.

She was exhausted, that she was sure of, but with all of the questions running through her head, sleep would be impossible to find. She tossed and turned on the little bed, hoping she could tune out all the questions so she could finally get some sleep.

Murmurs coming from the door somehow momentarily cleared the thoughts in her head. She could faintly hear Haku's icy voice and Zeniba's motherly one.

She knew it was them, who else could it be? She knew they were talking about her, what else would they talk about?

She climbed out of the bed, dragging the pillow behind her. She then sat herself behind the door and listened intently to the conversation held in the other room...

"I told her this was all a dream; before we flew here," Haku said miserably. "But now she probably remembers everything, Zeniba. _Everything_." Haku paused a while, taking deep breaths in hopes of calming down. "I couldn't just leave her there fading into nothing," he began, "I could have left her once she ate, but she would've attracted far too much attention from the bath house."

"Why do things have to be this way?," Haku said dejectedly.

"Kohaku," Zeniba said and sighed, "of course you couldn't leave her; you love her. At least she isn't mad at you for ly---"

"It was for her own good," Haku cut in. "I had to lie. You of all spirits know that humans do not belong in the Spirit World."

"It must have been very painful to tell her those lies, it is sad that it was all put to waste," Zeniba said wistfully.

"You cannot _begin_ to understand how _painful_ it was," Haku retorted, "You do not know how painful it _is_, and _will be_."

Zeniba just sighed in response. "But Kohaku, will you really let her walk away again?"

"I don't know, but I have to, right Zeniba?," Haku asked.

"Kohakunushi Nigihayami," Zeniba sighed, "maybe the task of deciding whether or not to let her remain here in our world is not only up to you, but also up to her. You did hear her; her life in the human world _is_ empty without you."

"But Zeniba…"

Haku sighed then asked, "If she leaves, will the spell hold?"

"With the recent occurrence, I do not think so Kohaku," Zeniba answered.

They fell silent.

"What are we going to do now?," Haku said as he broke the tense silence.

"Well Kohaku," Zeniba sighed once more, "it seems your love has no boundaries; her love made her come back, and your love brought her back. I don't think any spell can hinder you two."

"But Zeniba, humans are not meant to reside in our world," Haku sadly stated.

"Kohaku, spirits are not supposed to love humans," Zeniba chuckled, "both of you defy the laws of nature just by loving each other."

"But I can't ask of her to leave her world for mine," Haku whispered.

"How would you know if you don't ask her?," Zeniba reasoned, "For all you know, she might want to leave her life in the human world as much as you want her here."

Haku sighed then asked, "What if she still wants to go back to the human world, even if I offer her to stay?"

"Knowing you Kohaku, you would let her go despite all the pain you will go through. You love her too much," Zeniba answered.

"Yes, that is true," Haku sighed.

Chihiro still sat behind the closed door, burying her face into the pillow, with tears rolling down her eyes, as she eavesdropped on the conversation in the other room.


	15. Chapter 15: Sleep

Thank you so much for all the reviews! :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Spirited Away

A/N: i'm so sorry i didn't update as soon as i promised... too many reasons... writer's block, holidays, school, etc. oh well...

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Chapter 15: Sleep

"I'll let her decide. Whichever world she chooses, I will respect her decision."

Chihiro could not take any more of this. She had enough of this. She stood up from her spot in front of the door, and wiped the tears from her eyes. She slowly walked back to the tiny bed, dragging the pillow behind her.

As she lay on the bed, staring at the dark ceiling, she waited for sleep to take her. She absently thought of what her decision should be; stay in the Spirit World, or go back to her world – the human world. She pushed those thoughts away, hoping procrastination would give her enough peace of mind to sleep.

Eventually, exhaustion from her long day won over, and she finally managed to get some sleep.

* * *

"Are you aware that she heard most of our conversation Kohaku?"

Haku's eyes widened in shock; he was too emotional to notice that Chihiro eavesdropped on his lamenting. "You knew, but you did not even bother to stop our conversation! Furthermore, you let her hear _everything_!," Haku retorted. He managed to put as much anger as he could into his voice, while still keeping it low enough from letting it escape to the other room.

Zeniba sighed. "As if you would have told her anything. She might as well find out from the both of us."

Haku tried to calm himself. It was done; there was nothing more he could do. He could not snatch the words they exchanged from Chihiro's memory. At least, she knows how much he loves her. He sighed.

"So Kohaku, what are you going to do now?," Zeniba asked, with a somewhat mischievous glint in her eyes. Haku restrained himself from lashing out on the old woman.

"We might as well sleep. In the morning, I will tell her that I will leave her by the boundary; there she will decide," Haku said plainly.

"Very well, Kohaku. However, before we sleep, may I ask one more question?," Zeniba asked.

"Even if I refuse, you would still ask," Haku blankly stated.

"Do you really _want_ her to stay? You seem bent on making sure she returns to _her_ world. I know humans are not meant to reside in our world, but she is different – she seems to be more than just a mere human."

Haku sighed heavily. He was not even sure himself. He did not know the reason why he seemed determined to make sure that Chihiro returns to her world, no matter how masochistic that looked.

"Maybe, I do not want her to suffer. Maybe, I do not want her to get hurt in our world. Maybe, I do not know if I can protect her here. Maybe, I want her to stay in her world because if she gets hurt there, I cannot blame myself. Maybe, I want her to return to her world because that is where I feel she belongs. I do not know Zeniba. "

The two sighed. Things were just too complicated. Maybe a few hours of sleep could clear all of their heads, especially the heads of those who still had much to decide.

* * *

Next chapter will be up in..... errr... an hour? I will try to finish this tonight ;) only a few more chapters left...


	16. Chapter 16: Breakfast

Disclaimer: I do not own Spirited Away

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Chapter 16: Breakfast

Sunlight flooded into the room and onto Chihiro's face. With all of the thoughts that ran through her head, her sleep was restless, but at least she was able to find some sleep last night. She groggily crawled out of the little bed she slept in.

Today, she had to decide. She knew that her deadline would probably be before sunset, knowing that as long as the sun was out, she could walk back to her world – the human world. With these thoughts whizzing through her head, she did not notice that she had already walked the small distance from the bed to the door.

She stared at the doorknob. She could hear the faint sounds of clattering utensils and the sound of someone cooking. She sighed then opened the door.

Zeniba and Haku looked as if they did not move from where they left. They still sat on the same stools as they did last night. Zeniba silently sipped her tea, with No Face sitting patiently beside her, while Haku watched as inanimate objects flew around the room, preparing their breakfast.

"Good morning," Chihiro greeted. Zeniba smiled as she was sipping her tea, No Face nodded and grunted in response, and Haku just briefly looked at her. The atmosphere was slightly awkward.

Chihiro began to assume that they found out that she eavesdropped on them last night, although she wondered how they would have found out. Chihiro was about to say something, but she was cut off as their breakfast flew to the table.

"Ittadakimasu," she whispered.

They ate silently.

Once they had finished, the plates and utensils flew to the sink to wash themselves. No Face stepped out into the fields, and Zeniba joined him saying she had to help the poor thing tend the garden.

Only Haku and Chihiro were left in the house, along with the flying inanimate objects finishing up their chores.

Haku now gazed at the window, silent. Chihiro shifted in her stool.

"How did you know that I heard your conversation last night?," Chihiro asked. The silence was beginning to be unbearable for her.

"Zeniba knew."

Chihiro nodded.

Haku sighed.

"Chihiro, since you already know what I have in mind, it will be easier to tell you. I want you to decide."

"Whether I return to the human world or stay here," Chihiro added.

"Chihiro, I will take you to the boundary of the Spirit World. There I will let you decide, Chihiro. If you choose to stay, wait there until sunset. If you choose to leave, I believe it is best if you go as soon as you make the decision." Haku's gaze went to the floor. He was trying with all his might to restrain himself from saying her name as much as possible.

"The boundary? The place where we first said goodbye? Where we promised we would see each other again?," Chihiro blurted. Haku held a pained expression. He looked up at her and nodded.


	17. Chapter 17: Goodbye

Disclaimer: I do not own Spirited Away

* * *

Chapter 17: Goodbye

Chihiro and Haku said their goodbyes before they set out to the boundary.

As Haku flew with Chihiro on his back, he began preparing himself for the pain he will endure once she was gone. He would not let her sacrifice her life in the human world for him.

As they flew past the bathhouse, Chihiro silently wished she could have visited the bathhouse before she left. She missed it so much; the workers bustling through the halls, the guests wandering around the bath wings, the spirits relaxing in their baths, the work of cleaning the tubs, the bathhouse tiles that flew behind the wall, and all her friends there; Lin, Kamaji, Zeniba, and Boh.

They finally reached the boundary of the Spirit World. This place held the memory of when Chihiro and Haku first said goodbye to each other, and maybe, where they will say their last goodbyes. There, Haku guaranteed that they would see each other again, knowing he could not be able to fulfill that promise. Somehow, they were able to meet once more, but it could be the very last. There, on top of those steps, beside the stone frog, they parted. Will it happen once more today? But today, they may never have the chance to see each other again.

Chihiro slowly climbed down Haku's slithering body. She gazed at the landscape before her, as she had yesterday. Haku reverted to his human form and watched Chihiro. He shook his head, thinking that she should leave her to think; it was a decision she must make, one that he will respect no matter what it was. He slowly turned to leave.

"Wait Haku," Chihiro whispered. Haku turned to her, wondering what she had to say.

"Before you leave me to think, I want to say goodbye, if ever I…" She trailed off.

Tears began to glisten in her eyes. She slowly walked to where Haku was standing. He was staring at the ground before him, unable to look at the girl he loved. Chihiro stood close to Haku, their faces just a few inches from each other. Haku looked up, noticing their proximity. He gave her a confused look. She smiled.

Chihiro was not sure of what she was doing, but she knew that this was the perfect way to say goodbye, if she ever came to that decision. She closed her eyes for a while, and then slowly opened them again. Haku still looked at her, a puzzled look adorning his features.

Chihiro slowly moved one of her hands to his and held it, while she let the other move to his face and gently laid it on the side of his face, caressing his cheek.

Haku's eyes widened in surprise at the contact, but his expression gradually changed, and a loving smile appeared on his face as he tightened his grip on Chihiro's hand. She smiled at his response.

She slowly inched towards his face, and she slowly closed her eyes. Haku did the same.

Finally, their lips met.

All the love Haku felt, he poured it into that kiss. Haku knew all the pain he endured and will endure, will mean nothing as long as he had that moment.

All the love Chihiro felt, she poured into that kiss. Chihiro knew that no matter what she decided, she will always have that moment.

* * *

:) almost done...


	18. Chapter 18: Decision

Disclaimer: I do not own Spirited Away

* * *

Chapter 18: Decision

It's not easy making decisions, especially those that could change your life _forever_.

Decision-making is never fun. It can give you sleepless nights. It can make you restless, emotional, and tired. It can keep you occupied, with millions of thoughts running through your head.

Procrastination seems to be the best way to temporarily escape the dread of decisions. However, Chihiro learned that this is not true – the hard way.

It was already in the afternoon. Chihiro only had a few hours left of sunlight, but a few hours was not enough. She felt like she needed a century before she could finally decide.

She really wondered why she could not find herself leaving her life in the human world. She thought of her school. She had not made deep connections with her fellow students, and she began to wonder how they would react when they found that she suddenly disappeared. She then thought of her future. She never really thought about that. She never had any definite plans; where she wanted to go to high school or even college, what she wanted to be when she was old enough to work. She then began to think of her parents; they may not have nurtured her with as much love as she may have wanted, but they were still _her_ parents. She was an only child; they were the only family she had, and she was the only family they had. Could she really just walk away from them?

She tried to think of what _held_ her to the human world.

Then she thought of what held her to this world.

Here, she felt like she belonged. Here, she felt herself. Here, she felt happy.

This world had her friends. This world had Haku.

But could she give up her home for this world?

The human world may not have been her ideal home, but it was still _her home_.

It was almost late in the afternoon. She had so little time left, yet she still has not come to a decision.

She looked out onto the rolling hills and sighed.

* * *

Haku walked to the boundary of the Spirit World; he did not fly.

He wanted to prepare himself for the image of the top of those cold stone steps empty; no Chihiro.

He knew she left. After all, she did say goodbye. When you say goodbye, it means you are leaving.

However, Haku was still on his way to the boundary. He still left himself with a sliver of hope. That maybe, their love was truly that powerful; enough to defy all logic.

He sighed. Hoping too much would lead to more pain, and he already had too much pain to deal with.

He could see the large stone frog ahead. The streetlights were already lit, and the ferry full of spirits was already glistening on the river.

There was no Chihiro.

"She probably left after that kiss," Haku whispered.

He sat on the steps. He let the pain of loss overcome him. Tears began to sting his eyes.

* * *

Then, slender arms wrapped around his neck. His eyes widened in shock, and he quickly turned to the person behind him.

"I was waiting for you, you know."

Haku smiled. She stayed.

He hugged her tightly, as she laughed at him.

"What took you so long? I didn't want to attract any spirits, so I hid," Chihiro said as looked at Haku as she laughed in his arms.

"I… I thought you left as soon as you said goodbye," Haku admitted.

Chihiro laughed once more and gazed straight into his beautiful deep green eyes saying, "Why would I leave? I love you Kohaku."

* * *

THE END.

woohoo! my first ever completed fanfic!!

thank you so much for all those who reviewed and alerted!! :) (is that even right? alerted?)

i had a bit of a hard time trying to finish this story, since people asked it to end happy....

my original plan was to end it all tragic... oh well... it's done. and it's happy. and they kissed.

:) thank you!


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